Tim Duncan is so confident he has already crafted himself a throne made of ice. And look at the competitive fire oozing from Popovich. These guys cannot be beat.
Thursday, May 31, 2007
The Equation Behind the Unstoppable Spurs
Detroit? Cleveland? It does not matter who comes out of the East. The Spurs are your champions. One simple equation tells the tale:
Tim Duncan is so confident he has already crafted himself a throne made of ice. And look at the competitive fire oozing from Popovich. These guys cannot be beat.
Tim Duncan is so confident he has already crafted himself a throne made of ice. And look at the competitive fire oozing from Popovich. These guys cannot be beat.
Wednesday, May 9, 2007
Roger Clemens: Go Away. Now. Please.
Please indulge Drive and Diss as we momentarily step away from the world of basketball to send a public service announcement to Roger Clemens: You orchestrate these dramatic "comebacks" year after year then grouse about getting all of the attention that you work so hard to court. Enough. You say it's not about the money when clearly it's all about the money. Enough. You have taken your picture with 4 of the 5 members of Aerosmith. Enough.
-E
-E
Thursday, May 3, 2007
Wednesday, May 2, 2007
The Laker Curse (AKA Curse of the Logo) continues....
Congragulations Phil Jackson for another mediocre year and entertaining post season for Laker Haters everywhere. However, there was one subject missing that I found very odd. Every night I tuned in to watch the Lakers lose I noticed there was a distinct ommission of Phil Jackson "innovations" that he and his staff have taken credit for in previous championship years.
The most treasured invention is of course the "Triangle Offense". Did anyone notice that this stupid phrase was not mentioned more than twice during the Laker playoff run/exit? Why did the broadcasters stop drinking the Kool Aid? Does it only "work" when a Phil Jackson team wins??? Just for fun I decided to do a reimagined rendition of Phil's notes and playbook. This is a playbook simulation after watching 500 + games during Phil's baskeball tenure:
Step one: Have someone dribble the ball up.
The most treasured invention is of course the "Triangle Offense". Did anyone notice that this stupid phrase was not mentioned more than twice during the Laker playoff run/exit? Why did the broadcasters stop drinking the Kool Aid? Does it only "work" when a Phil Jackson team wins??? Just for fun I decided to do a reimagined rendition of Phil's notes and playbook. This is a playbook simulation after watching 500 + games during Phil's baskeball tenure:
Step one: Have someone dribble the ball up.
Step two: Pass the ball to the most dominant player in the league. (Note to self, make sure to entrench yourself to a team that has the most dominant player in the league)
Step three: Have the most domininant player in the league shoot the damn ball.
Step Four: Try and take credit for it when you win. Use Tex Winter's steady hand and draw a pretty triangle.
Step Five: Wear a really smug look on yourself and tease the opposing teams underdog city while in the winning locker room press conferences. (Note to self: This does not work as well when losing a series. You must only do this during winning to show how much of an ass you can really be while being a hyprocrite to "zen buddhist thought" at the same time. )
Go Clippers. Til next year Laker fans.
-J
Go Clippers. Til next year Laker fans.
-J
Tuesday, May 1, 2007
The Calvin Booth Identity Crisis
Washington Wizards back-up center Calvin Booth is a man in search of himself. Sometimes he’s a man about town, working rooms, and picking up ladies.
Other times he confuses playing for the Wizards with being an actual spell-casting wizard. Please note the following photo has not been retouched:
But the confounding quest for the soul of Calvin Booth becomes truly apparent when he takes the court. This is when the “Cal” tattoo on his left shoulder is visible. Nothing too unusual there. We here at Drive and Diss have “Drive and Diss” tattooed up and down each arm and leg as well as across our abdomen, but we digress. The “Cal” tattoo is so mystifying because it is in the exact same font as the logo for the University of California at Berkeley. Booth is from Ohio and attended Penn State. Booth has zero connection with the state of California. In fact, he has requested that the Wizards leave him home on any road trips that require travel through California. Could the tattoo be a desperate cry for help?
There is only one solution for Calvin Booth. He needs to get “Cal” tattooed in the wingdings font on his right shoulder. It will look something like this:
Witness Calvin Booth reborn with the elusive balance and inner peace he has been seeking his entire professional career. This should also drastically increase his rebounding numbers. Calvin Booth wins and more importantly, the Wizards win.
-E
Other times he confuses playing for the Wizards with being an actual spell-casting wizard. Please note the following photo has not been retouched:
But the confounding quest for the soul of Calvin Booth becomes truly apparent when he takes the court. This is when the “Cal” tattoo on his left shoulder is visible. Nothing too unusual there. We here at Drive and Diss have “Drive and Diss” tattooed up and down each arm and leg as well as across our abdomen, but we digress. The “Cal” tattoo is so mystifying because it is in the exact same font as the logo for the University of California at Berkeley. Booth is from Ohio and attended Penn State. Booth has zero connection with the state of California. In fact, he has requested that the Wizards leave him home on any road trips that require travel through California. Could the tattoo be a desperate cry for help?
There is only one solution for Calvin Booth. He needs to get “Cal” tattooed in the wingdings font on his right shoulder. It will look something like this:
Witness Calvin Booth reborn with the elusive balance and inner peace he has been seeking his entire professional career. This should also drastically increase his rebounding numbers. Calvin Booth wins and more importantly, the Wizards win.
-E
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)